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Saturday, August 27, 2005

Could I be an addict?

Here is a list of things that could mean I'm a Star Wars addict. Some of them pertain to me, which I will italicize, some are just amusing, and some I changed to sound better, so enjoy.

You can recite *all* the dialogue from the trilogy.

You watch the entire trilogy at least once a month.


Any time you pick up a walkie-talkie or two-way radio, the first thing you say is "TK-421, why aren't you at your post?"

You've written several letters to the President recommending that he dissolve the council, put power in the hands of the regional governors, and let fear keep the local systems in line.

After several hours of poker, you got thrown out of the game for suggesting, "How about some sabacc?"

When trying unsuccessfully to snare that last Cheerio floating in your cereal bowl, you remarked, "the Force is strong with this one."

On Halloween, you would never dress as: Luke, Han Solo, Leia, Vader, Chewie, Threepio, Artoo

However, you would dress as: Wedge, Porkins, Crix Madine, that spider droid from Jabba's palace that fat dancer from Jabba's palace, Sy Snootles, the Cantina bartender. The monster in the trash compactor, Boba Fett, An Imperial probe droid

You've been pulled over by a policeman, and when asked to see your driver's license you replied, "You don't need to see my identification."

And when he asks about your two friends in the back "They're for sale, if you want them."

You have held up an onion ring and said, "Look sir...droids!"

While sitting on the couch with your girlfriend, she comments about being cold. So, naturally, you slice open the side of the cushion and stuff her in.

You answer the phone "Die wanna wanga?"

Whenever you buy a new appliance, you make sure to get one that speaks Bacchi.

Whenever you catch sight of cars behind yours, you say "Fighters, coming in, point three five."

When a cop catches you speeding, you floor it, saying "I've outrun Imperial starships, and not the local bulk cruisers..."

You ride your motorbike through the forest at top speed, and survive after throwing yourself off just before it hits a tree.

You've 'wielded' a flashlight and made humming sounds.


You wave your hand purposefully and 'use the force' to open and close automatic doors or elevator doors.

When accelerating your car to enter the freeway, you tell your passengers to strap in and prepare for light speed.

Your significant other dumps you because everytime she/he says, "I love you" you always respond, "I know."

When leaving a restaurant, you can't resist signing Boba Fett or Darth Vader in the guestbook.

You went through a state of depression when Chewie died.

You look at "big hairy carpets" with more respect than before.

With a blue-tinted plastic tube, a flashlight, two hours of a Saturday night, and 4 rolls of blue electrical tape, you finally complete your own working "Light-saber"

You listen for Obi-Wan while attempting to parallel park.

You could have sworn you saw bantha tracks during your trip to the grand canyon.

The cinnamon buns in your hair start to grow mold.

You call your friend who is a midget Wicket.

You refer to money as credits without trying to.

You respond to any mention of the legality of something with "I will make it legal."

You start reliving the speeder bike chase on your motorbike.

Someone tells you your car is old and beat-up, you reply "She'll do .5 past light speed..."

You refer to getting off the freeway as coming out of hyperspace.

You are POSITIVE you are force-sensitive and only lack the proper training.

Someone says they will try to do something you automatically respond "Do or do not. There is no try."

Your house robe is brown and extra large.

You type in the terms for a search engine as if entering coordinates, then shout "Punch it, Chewie!" as you click on search.

You nickname your car the Millennium Falcon.


You call your boss "Master"

When asked if you want to be buried or cremated you say "I'll just vanish like the rest of the Jedi"

You have a bad feeling about everything.

You call your girlfriend, "your Highness."

While listening to the soundtrack without knowing the name of the song you are listening to, you know exactly what's happening while it's playing.


You have ever thought the world would be a better place if it were like the Rebel Alliance/New Republic.

Obiwan Kenobi and Yoda come to you in your dreams and give you advice about tough situations you're dealing with.

Instead of saving for college, you save up for Star Wars stuff you plan to buy.

Anyone who doesn't like Star Wars you proclaim is an Imperial.

When you are ticked off at somebody, you send bounty hunters all over the place to find them and then you encase him in carbonite for a new wall decoration.

When your alarm clock goes off in the morning, your reply is, "Unexpected this is... and unfortunate!"

You've kept the "good" action figures stored separately from the "bad" ones.

As a child, whenever you had broken something, your response was always, "It must've had a self-destruct mechanism. I didn't hit it that hard."

You've refused to enter a cave/cavern/tunnel without a handgun and a large stick.

When you waited for a friend to catch up with you, you told him to hurry up or he'd be a permanent resident.

You've ever found yourself in a chat room, training Jedi.

You've ever told your younger brother at the dinner table, "Use the fork, Luke."

You've ever roped off your Star Wars Action Figure collection, claiming it to be an independent nation.

I almost forgot...

"We'll be destroyed for sure. This is madness!" - C-3PO

1 Comments:

At 9:28 AM EDT, Blogger kimw said...

Glad to see you didn't forget the quote at the end!

 

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